A Reintroduction and Challenging the Status Quo

I did a fun thing a few weeks ago. I reread all of my blog posts, starting from the beginning. It’s been almost three years since I started writing here, and I honestly couldn’t even remember from week to week what I wrote, so I wanted to make sure I stood by what I’ve said over the years. I’ve also been thinking about sharing this blog with more people I know IRL, so reviewing my posts was important to me.

Continue reading “A Reintroduction and Challenging the Status Quo”

Books of 2020: Part 1

I REALLY should not have put this post off. There’s a reason I switched to quarterly book posts! And I’ve done a lot more reading than usual this year since I have more time with my career change. Anyway, here’s the list. I’m not writing blurbs for each book; I’ll focus on the ones I ranked highly. I’m also not including the cover photo for each book, though I’ll try to include most since I personally really like seeing the cover art.

…Except I totally do. via GIPHY
Continue reading “Books of 2020: Part 1”

What Did I Miss?

"What Did I Miss" text over a dark background of lightning

Well, hi there. My name is Elizabeth. Just thought I would remind you since I’ve been AWOL for MONTHS.

On Friday, my roomie Lyra and I watched the Hamilton filming on Disney+ (which I use my sister’s log-in for because I’m a cheapskate). It was MAGICAL. And I told Lyra that after watching the musical, which I had never seen, Jefferson’s song, “What Did I Miss?” had become one of my favorites. Don’t get me wrong, the song was always great. But the VISUAL elements really made it. Hence, this post title.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yV6bLE4oJ0
Watch the whole clip here!
Continue reading “What Did I Miss?”

2019 in Review

text reading 2019 in review over a photo of a bottle of champagne and champagne flutes

Well, we’ve made it through another year, which means it’s time for an annual recap. Here’s the highlight reel from 2019! Want to see how far things have really come? Check out 2018 in review to compare.

This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Read more about my affiliate philosophy here.

Financial Security

I’m not sure how to assess this category. My net worth went up significantly this year, and I’m now a homeowner. I have a very healthy emergency fund. But at the same time, I just left my job with a stable paycheck and haven’t replaced that income yet. I’m confident I’ll get there, but it’ll be a little nervewracking until that point. But that is also the whole reason for an emergency fund that can cover the better part of a year’s worth of essential expenses (things that can’t be put on a credit card short-term: mortgage, student loan payments, health insurance premiums, utilities).

The Good Wife character saying "Am I broke again?"
via GIPHY

And I mean it about the credit card. I know that the general rule of thumb is that “debt is bad,” especially credit card debt. But I’m starting a damn business, here. If it takes a few months to generate an income that will support my monthly expenses, I have no shame about putting groceries and gas on my credit card until then. The interest paid will be well worth the wiggle room it gives me to get this business off the ground.

Lucy from I Love Lucy saying I got a credit card, money is no object.
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Happiness

StarDog and his faithful sidekick, COMET!

I know I’ve been happy in the past year. There have been some really wonderful moments. But there have also been some really hard ones. Despite those, I’m so happy that I’ve found a new career path that I’m passionate about, and that I’ve moved to a new city where I think I have a better chance of building a sustainable life. I’ve met some wonderful people, and I’ve reconnected with some old friends. I’m happy that I’ve been able to spend lots of time with family this year, and that I now live in the same city as my BFF Lyra (and HER NEW DOG, aka COMET!).

Travel

This year, I got to visit two countries that were very high on my bucket list: Morocco and Kenya. They were both amazing, and I’m really glad I had that opportunity through work. But so many people asked me if I would miss the work travel when I left my job, and the answer is a resounding “no.” Why? When I travel for work, it’s work. I don’t have full control of the itinerary, my time is often limited, and I always end up sick by the end of the trip because of how stressed I am. Instead, in 2020, I’m looking forward to traveling at my own pace. To not having to ration my vacation time, and to not having to attend meetings or lead a group. It’ll be grand.

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SunCat

If you’ve read this blog for more than 2 seconds, then you already know that I am completely unashamed to be a Cat Lady. SunCat has been with me for 15 years, and she’s my best friend. She’s more affectionate that StarDog, she sleeps with me every night, and she’s gotten me through some pretty horrific times of my life. This fall, she was diagnosed with two different types of cancer, one of which has metastasized. I was devastated, and the diagnosis came in the middle of me buying a house and right before I left for a 2.5-week international trip. To say I was stressed is an understatement.

Thankfully, things have improved since her initial diagnosis. The goal here isn’t to cure her; that’s highly unlikely given the types of cancer she has. However, the chemotherapy treatment she’s on acts in a palliative capacity; it minimizes the symptoms of the cancer and slows its spread. Since starting it, she’s gained weight and gotten her energy back. I’m so glad that she did well with the move to Cleveland, and I plan on spoiling her for whatever time she has left (though let’s be real, that’s nothing new).

LOOK AT THOSE TOE BEANS! SunCat is a huge fan of my new heated blanket.

Health

It’s been a tough year. I completely pivoted my career trajectory, and in the midst of that, I’ve had to deal with the reality of leaving my job, starting a business, and moving somewhere new. The stress has definitely gotten to me at times, especially in these last few months when it felt like one hit came after another came after another. That being said, I’m really happy with where I’m ending my year. I think I’m in a good place to be healthier (mentally and physically) in 2020, which I wouldn’t be able to say if I was still in Washington, DC and in my previous job. Hopefully, this prediction proves true in my 2020 recap!

2019 in Numbers

Reading Highlights

I list every book I read, but some are better than others. Here’s a list of all the books I rated DEAR (Drop Everything and Read) this year. Out of the 85 books I read, I loved these 23 the most. I swear I didn’t plan this but turns out female authors swept the list this year:

Nonfiction

Fiction

To see all the books that I read (including many that I ranked just below DEAR as “Highly Recommend”), check out my quarterly posts:


Ok, we’re calling 2019 a wrap. On to 2020 and all the new adventures it’ll bring!

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The FIRE Movement’s Fatphobia Problem

The FIRE Movement's Fatphobia Problem owning the stars

The FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early) Movement is how I stumbled into the personal finance space. It’s how I landed on my career change and new path of entrepreneurism. It’s how I’ve made great friends around the country and around the world. All this to say that overall, the FIRE Movement has a lot of great things going for it in my book. I’m not sure I would say I’m on any sort of straightforward “FIRE” Path, but it has strongly influenced my thinking on money.

While the majority of the FIRE and Personal Finance Twittersphere is lovely, there is this concerning thread I’ve noticed popping up again and again. And it finally annoyed me enough that I decided to call it out. I see some people in the FIRE movement arguing some variation of this line: If fat people just applied the same discipline to their health as they did to their finances, they’d lose weight. Or: Until you’re a healthy weight, you shouldn’t waste time worrying about money. Or: They just need to try harder/track macros/do intermittent fasting and all of their problems would be solved. This general thread is all too similar to the “optimization” mindset that I’ve previously called bullshit on.

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All of these threads are frustratingly out of line with the science on weight and weight-loss. They’re also dangerous and throw up more barriers for people who aren’t inferior–morally, intellectually, or with regard to willpower.

The Science

I know there are so many people out there who are like, I lost 70 pounds exercising and counting calories and now I’m healthy! I’m calling bullshit. The science just doesn’t pan out regarding diets and weight loss. The vast majority of people who go on a diet and lose weight end up regaining it all back…or more. And this is true whether or not they maintain their diet or exercise program. Because your body doesn’t understand that the weight loss was on purpose. Instead, it says, “oh shit, our calorie consumption has gone down–must be a famine!” and it starts automatically slowing metabolism and storing more energy in fat. Once more for the people in the back: Your 👏anecdotal 👏evidence 👏has 👏no 👏scientific 👏validity!

via GIPHY

Did you know that of those who go on a diet and actually lose weight, 95% will regain that weight (or more) in 5 years? 95%!!! What’s more, chronic dieting, and yo-yoing weight, have major health impacts. Dieting encourages your body to store more energy…so many dieters will end up heavier than when they started.

This isn’t a willpower thing. And before you @ me, how about you read all of the science behind this research. I’ve been doing a deep dive into this topic lately (though I’ve only skimmed the surface). Here are some of the notable takeaways from Dr. Linda Bacon and Dr. Lucy Aphramor, who have written quite a bit of the seminal text on the topic. Emphases are my own.

Weight Science: Evaluating the Evidence for a Paradigm Shift by Linda Bacon and Lucy Aphramor

“Current guidelines recommend that “overweight” and “obese” individuals lose weight through engaging in lifestyle modification involving diet, exercise and other behavior change. This approach reliably induces short term weight loss, but the majority of individuals are unable to maintain weight loss over the long term and do not achieve the putative benefits of improved morbidity and mortality. Concern has arisen that this weight focus is not only ineffective at producing thinner, healthier bodies, but may also have unintended consequences, contributing to food and body preoccupation, repeated cycles of weight loss and regain, distraction from other personal health goals and wider health determinants, reduced self-esteem, eating disorders, other health decrement, and weight stigmatization and discrimination…

While it is well established that obesity is associated with increased risk for many diseases, causation is less well-established. Epidemiological studies rarely acknowledge factors like fitness, activity, nutrient intake, weight cycling or socioeconomic status when considering connections between weight and disease. Yet all play a role in determining health risk. When studies do control for these factors, increased risk of disease disappears or is significantly reduced”

Body Respect: What Conventional Health Books Get Wrong, Leave Out, and Just Plain Fail to Understand about Weight by Linda Bacon, PhD and Lucy Aphramor, PhD, RD

“Rather than being an indelible character trait or personal failure, post-diet compensatory eating comes as a direct consequence of dieting itself, our bodies’ nearly irresistible biological compensation triggered by weight loss. Accusations of personal failure ignore this science and are value judgments based on stereotypes or blame-ridden interpretations of behavioral counterreactions to starvation.”

“Several studies, including the largest health and nutrition study conducted by the U.S. government, the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, document that higher-weight people eat no more than lean people, despite the popular misconception. One review examined thirteen studies, and found the intake of heavier people to be less than or equal to thin people in twelve of them.”


There is so much more science on this topic. Here’s a great article from Slate that links to several key findings. I’m not a scientist, and this isn’t a science blog, so I’ll leave it there for now in terms of evidence.

My Story

After my accident, I gained 30 pounds in a year. And then I kept gaining. For a very long time, I beat myself up about this. Coping with that (VERY) traumatic experience with pints of Ben and Jerry’s was weak of me (went my inner dialogue). If I was strong, and if I was healthy, and if I made good decisions, it shouldn’t be hard to get back to that lower weight, which I always thought of as my baseline. And as I cycled through diets and subsequent weight gain, my body got even more screwed up and confused.

via GIPHY

I almost died in that accident. If the truck had been going a little faster, it would have thrown me head-first into a parked car. And then I went through months of intense pain and recovery, which included multiple surgeries. I am not at all ashamed of how I handled that time–I was surviving. But it isn’t surprising that the weight stayed on even after I recovered and regained mobility. Especially since my stress levels have stayed pretty consistently high in the years since that weight gain. Do I wish I was back at my weight from sophomore year? Yes! Am I going to let that get in the way of enjoying my life, eating what my body wants, and moving in ways that feel good? Hell no. I can be healthy without losing that weight. And in fact, I’m better off not dieting to achieve that pipe dream because that comes with its own health side effects.

The Financial Angle

The weight-loss industry is a $72 billion behemoth. And they’re really good at messaging couched in science that sells more product. Fatphobia is good for their business. That’s billions of dollars each year that Americans (and the majority are women) are spending on weight loss. Money they aren’t investing (which is an insult to the injury of lower pay to start with). But more than that, this message affects people lives. There’s a stigma around owning your space and being the healthiest version of yourself–no matter your size.

Because of that very effective messaging, the general “truth” that obesity is the root of all health evils seems to be taken as scripture. However, when you read articles or studies where obesity is discussed, there is not necessarily any strong link to causation. In any of them. And anyone with even a small background in science or math can tell you that correlation DOES NOT imply causation.


Look, I’m not saying it’s cool to go out and eat a dozen Krispy Kremes every day. But I also wish we could move past this trend of fat-shaming (in a space where it isn’t even remotely relevant). And even when we are talking about health, that conversation should be on promoting good things rather than restriction and failure.

Because the science is complex, I’m sure this conversation will continue to evolve. But one of the things I love about the personal finance community is the support we give each other. And this is definitely an area where we seem to fall short. Let’s get better.

Guest Post: Adventures in Financial Adulting

Given my post of two weeks ago about where I might move soon, and given that my BFF Lyra lives in Cleveland already, I thought this week would be the perfect opportunity to have her write a guest post about her move there, the rationale, and what it’s meant for her finances (also, guest posts mean I can skip a week of writing and not feel guilty! Yay!). Please give her all the welcomes so that I can con her into convince her to guest post again!

Continue reading “Guest Post: Adventures in Financial Adulting”

Books of Q1 2019

After writing my book lists at the end of last year, and realizing that it was so long I had to break the list into two separate posts for non-fiction and fiction that were each massive, I decided to write quarterly book posts instead. So, for your reading pleasure, here are the books I read from the end of December 2018 through Q1 2019. I’m traveling this week, so there’s a good chance I’ve read a couple more books to add to this list, but you’ll just have to wait till the end of Q2 for those!

This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. That being said, my first preference is for you to check any recommended books out from your local library! Read more about my affiliate philosophy here. You can also check books out in e-book form and download them to the Kindle app, which means you don’t even have to put on pants and leave the house to get your book. Isn’t technology grand? Occasionally, books I read and review are also available for free through Amazon’s Kindle Unlimited program, and I make sure to note if that’s the case.

In the list below, the books are labelled by level of recommendation:

  • Drop everything to read this book (DEAR for short)
  • Highly recommended (HR)
  • Good book (GB)
  • OK
  • Meh don’t bother (MDB)

Non-Fiction Books

  • Refinery29 Money Diaries by Lindsey Stanberry. HR. I really enjoyed this book. I haven’t spent a lot of time reading the Money Diaries series on Refinery29, but it was kind of fun to read about how other women are spending their money from week to week and see how it compares to me. Stanberry also has some great financial advice for women starting out in the workplace, though I wouldn’t say any of it is wildly different if you’ve already read other personal finance books geared toward millennials. If you haven’t, this is definitely not a bad place to start! 
  • Fed Up by Gemma Hartley. DEAR. Hartley’s article in Harper’s Bazaar about emotional labor went viral last year, and this book deal was a result. And thank God for that. She does a great job of discussing what emotional labor is, why women carry the bulk of it, and why that’s a problem. As a woman, I found myself nodding along and thinking, “well, duh” quite a bit. It would be interesting to hear what a guy thinks while reading this. The only comment I have: I wish more time in the book had been spent on solutions (and not just for married couples). But that’s a pretty minor complaint, and everyone should read this book.
  • The Financial Diet by Chelsea Fagan and Lauren Ver Hage. HR. This book was a fun read, and I loved the great breakout sections featuring experts in different areas. Including Cait Flanders, who is one of my favorite writers! There’s some great advice in here about how to find your first apartment, cook at home, and be financially savvy. It’s a wonderful book for recent college grads who are overwhelmed by adulthood. I actually sent a copy to my youngest sister last fall based on recommendations from Twitter, and I decided I should finally read the book for myself. I’m glad I did!
  • The Nature Fix by Florence Williams. HR. Williams goes around the world learning about what science has to say about the effect of nature on our physical and mental health. This book was a compelling read about why it’s important to get outside, and specifically to get out in nature and not just on city streets. While we can’t all disappear and go camping for weeks on end, it did have some easy action items. One I’ve adopted since reading is putting cypress oil on my dryer sheets, and now my whole house smells like a lovely Japanese forest. Placebo or science, it makes me happier!
  • Becoming by Michelle Obama. DEAR. This was such a wonderful and fascinating read. It was interesting to read more about Obama’s early life and hear her perspective on her husband’s meteoric rise in politics. I think everyone should read this book. It combines discussion of politics, race, and gender in a witty and endearing memoir. Michelle kicks ass.
  • Rest by Alex Soojung-Kim Pang. HR. Pang analyzes the benefits of rest to our creativity and productivity by comparing habits of great thinkers throughout history, from artists to scientists to politicians. He breaks down rest into component parts, including naps, sleep, deep play, walks, exercise, etc. and explains why each are necessary to perform at our best. He also talks about how society has shifted to celebrate overwork and stress, to the detriment of our health and wellbeing. I’m hoping to bring some of his takeaways into my own routines, especially as my schedule seems to get busier and busier.
  • The Geography of Genius by Eric Weiner. HR. Weiner writes about his attempt to find out what makes places of genius special. From ancient Athens to Calcutta to Vienna to Silicon Valley. It was an interesting read, and I definitely learned something about these places. He dispels the myth of the lone genius; instead, these cities fostered genius in their people and gave rise to multiple creative geniuses at one specific point in history. There are several common threads, but one of them is exposure to new ideas from around the world; none of these cities were isolated or cut off from inspiration.
  • The Bullet Journal Method by Ryder Carroll. HR. I’ve been using a Bullet Journal setup for some time, and I love the method and its flexibility. Before this, I always carried around both a paper planner and a small notebook, but the ease of combining both in something that is customized especially to my life is really attractive. It means all of my notes, ideas, to-do lists, and calendars are in one place. I can tie ideas together and easily make plans. Despite already using Carroll’s unique journal system, I found reading the book to be really helpful. It introduced several new ways that I can document my life and my tasks to meet my goals, both personal and professional. This is definitely worth the read if you already Bullet Journal or if you’ve been looking for a better way to organize your life. The book is well-written for novices and experts of the method alike. Bonus tip: this is the notebook I use. It’s wonderful and magical and I will never look back at my sad Moleskine notebooks again.
  • Pass the 65 by Robert Walker. Not going to lie; this is the most boring book on this list. It’s basically the only thing I read in January (other than the occasional mindless romance to give my brain a break–see below). That being said, it gets the job done. It’s a good resource if you are studying for the Series 65 exam, though I definitely had to supplement it with other study materials to absorb what I read. It’s a standard textbook price at $50, but pro tip: I used a free Kindle Unlimited trial (normally $10/month) to read it, so it was free!

Fiction Books

  • Warprize by Elizabeth Vaughan.
  • Warsworn
  • Warlord
  • Warcry
  • Wardance
  • Warsong. GB. Look, these books aren’t groundbreaking. But sometimes I like a good familiar romance series when my life is chaos and I can’t focus on anything with more substance. Vaughan tells a good story, despite some plot issues and one-dimensional characters. It’s also a little weird that the first three books are not fantasy, and then in the next three, suddenly wyverns show up. But whatevs.
  • Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.
  • New Moon
  • Eclipse
  • Breaking Dawn. GB. Ok, so when I was looking for something to procrastinate with while studying for my exam, I realized that all of the Twilight Saga movies were on Hulu. So, of course, I watched them. And then I decided that I probably needed to reread all the books too. Really, the same rationale as above. And now I’m kind of regretting deciding to honestly list all the books I read…